Even if the connection isn’t a romantic one, you’re more inclined to view a clear vision of who you are and what you want.”A “get to know each other” date can be a simple meeting for coffee or lunch, she suggests keeping the interactions as relaxed as possible.“When you meet someone in person, it is that vibe and energy you connect with, and you have to use all five senses.
You can’t do that emailing, talking on the phone, texting or in pictures.”Breaking through walls of prior pain or poor relationships can be tough for some, but Alban Sunday said her most successful clients have taught her, “People who are the most open, have the most success.”Too frequently, Razbadouski said, that the feeling of loneliness can rush people into relationships that may not be best for them.“They may ignore things that are red flags that bite them in the butt later. You have to tell yourself, ‘If I date someone and it doesn’t work out, it is not the right one.’ Trust your gut and not try to force something to be something it isn’t, when your gut tells you it is not.”Being overly cautious she said can be a doubled-edged sword, however.“They are sometimes too scared to be themselves and so they are trying to be what they think is going to be attractive to somebody and they end up being anxious about dating and relationships because they aren’t being true to who they are,” she said.
"Everyone wants somebody with a good heart who is honest, and of course, everybody needs a good communicator.”Echoing those sentiments, Sue Razbadouski, licensed clinical social worker in the Rockford area, said, dating is difficult, especially for those over 50, and people need to be in a good place personally before reentering the dating scene for it to be a successful venture.
But success, she said, does not mean going into every potential date with the idea of wedding bells ringing in the near future.“They enjoy talking to them, and then all of a sudden, they want to go from somebody who they are getting to know, to ‘I am going to spend the rest of my life with them.’ They need to stand back some," Razbadouski said. “Some will say, ‘Well, I don’t need a friend,’ but we all need to know how to connect with other people.
Unlike online dating services, a human screens clients, which she said is one of many services she provides that makes her business unique.“I meet everyone in person,” Alban Sunday said.
“I like to be thought of as a connector and communicator, more so than a matchmaker. I can only put the people in front of them who I think they’ll like.”“The majority is looking for the same kinds of things, regardless of age, like shared interests, Alban Sunday, said.
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“I think sometimes we lose sight of how much alike we are in needs and desires, and we look really critically at ourselves.
That holds people back.”Additionally, Alban Sunday said, “You can sort out the types of people you don’t want a romantic relationship with easily.” Even still, she said, “Don’t block them out entirely because they could become a great friend who eventually introduces you to the right person.”For more information Dating Solutions can be reached by calling 815-621-3786. D., Clinic of Psychiatric Care is located at 1752 Windsor Road, #203, Loves Park.