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(Ain't gonna happen, Hugo.) Before getting too far into the weeds of this thought experiment, Schwyzer makes it clear that he's not talking about pedophiles or other obvious creeps; he's talking about men like Johnny Depp, who is apparently dating a woman in her late 20s, while he's just hit the big 5-0. The study Schwyzer cites actually says the opposite of what he thinks it does.