It’s all just a defense mechanism: pretend the one girl you know liked you is a goddess instead of risking rejection by getting back out into the dating pool. “This might mean dedicating yourself to the gym, signing up for a martial art, enrolling in an improv comedy class, playing a musical instrument at an open mic night. This is the hardest thing for a lot of guys to accept.: There IS NO WAY to just go get your ex back. these might extend the relationship by a few weeks.
Far more common: dudes obsess over their exes and transform them into angels because they can’t get other awesome girls. I wrote The Anti-Pickup Line to chronicle how I overcame that and to teach other guys to do the same. Also, I write about this in the book, but it is worth calling out what inspired it . Then go back to the drawing board and ask, “How can I become a more amazing man generally?
But there are some very obvious signs that say you are wasting your time, or making a fool of yourself. Your ex wants nothing to do with you In many of my articles and in my book, I advice people trying to get their ex back not to give up on first contact. He/she could be wondering why you contacted him/her (especially if you haven’t been in contact for while) and taking his/her time to respond.
Because out of the 3.5 billion women in the world, she is the most amazing, beautiful, perfectly matched girl for you?
Stay the same and she’ll see it was all just a fluke. You cannot change the core of your being in a single gesture. You’re not coming back this late in the game with a single desperate maneuver. Like the gulf between the man you are and the man you want to become. You have some work to do on yourself if you want to have healthy, lasting relationships with amazing women. Is it because she is the most special girl in the entire world, your one true soul mate?
After my ex-boyfriend and I broke up several months ago, someone told me the best way to get over a breakup was to start dating right away: “It’s really the best way to get yourself distracted and to forget about your ex.” I didn’t take that person’s advice, and I’m glad I didn’t because I’ve learned that the best way to get over a breakup is to take some time for yourself to feel whole again and to heal first before getting into another relationship. In my opinion, rushing into a new relationship right away without first healing is tantamount to putting a band-aid over a knife stab.
I know plenty of people who rushed into a new relationship and are not over their exes.